Disconnect to Connect and Reconnect

“Disconnect to rediscover the joys in connection.”

Are you spending copious amount of time on Facebook?

Can’t live without a wifi connection?

Can’t imagine days without your handphone or mobile?

It’s a common sight to see people on their handheld devices. In restaurants, family members are in their own separate mobile world even whilst they are seated together. Children are given ipads for their own separate entertainment in dinner sittings. While crossing the traffic junction, people can be texting away on their phones. On buses, I see passengers watching video clips on their mobiles or checking their FB accounts. In fact, sometimes, I find myself straining to see what they are looking at on their handheld devices.

Personally, it has been interesting. I am only observing more of what has been happening around me – in buses, restaurants and shopping malls – because I have been out of my home a lot more these days. For one, I started taking public transport, after sending my 10-year old car for scrap in March.

To say the least, I had been experiencing quite a change in terms of lifestyle. I recall a time when I would get all flustered up if I do not have an internet connection or if my laptop breaks down. I even experienced withdrawal symptoms should I go on a meditation retreat for a week.

In the past, my online work activities had kept me really busy. With the advent of social media, I have had little excess time to be out on a social basis. In any case, I believed that my lifestyle suited me fine since I consider myself to be an introvert. I rather enjoyed the silence. I made time for meditation but would often prefer to decline a dinner invitation for networking purposes.

The Discomforting Signs Arising from Disconnection

I was happy in my own little world…..until I started to experience a sense of disconnection.

I began to feel rather isolated, alone and cut-off from the world.

At first, I allowed myself to dwell in these emotions.

I also tried to meet up with friends here and there.

Still, the feelings of disconnection came back.

It took me a while to decide to do things differently.

It was also when I started sending out the intention for something purposeful that will take me out of my study room and meditation space.

Well, it manifested in the form of essential oils and exploring essential oils as a business opportunity.

Taking up the opportunity meant that I have to disconnect to connect. I soon found that it’s nothing like connecting over cups of tea. I began to take an active interest in the lifestyles of those around me. Through physically reaching out, my desire is to help others make more educated choices. Marketing offline, even though it is for the same purpose of creating transformation, certainly offers a different experience from writing an article on wellness and promoting it online.

Build Balance Between Disconnecting and Connecting

It sounds ironic that I would be suggesting to you – reader to my newsletter and blog – about disconnecting to connect now. After all, don’t I wish to stay in touch with you? Well, like all things in life, there has to be a balance.

I have since found that being on social media platforms especially Facebook has its advantages. Without having account on Facebook, I would not have reunited with long lost childhood friends. In fact, it was how some of them located me. We reconnected and laughed over old times. We found out that it was easy to pick up from where we left off. In a class reunion, it was amazing to realize that our friendship was pretty much alive even after 30 years of being out of contact. Since then, we have had a lot more connections and my life has been richer ever since. You may discover the joys of reconnection for yourself too!

Over the past few years, I had made new online friends from halfway across the world. Sure, you may think that such people can only count as acquaintances and therefore not as true friends. However, I beg to differ. An online introduction is always a good start. I would like to think that if we should ever meet in person, there would be less of an awkwardness. With increased opportunities to travel nowadays, there is every possibility of a physical meeting and sharing sunrise on the same beach. I am also reminded of the saying: there are no strangers in this world, just friends we have not met.

Notwithstanding, to build any kind of relationship, there has to be a deepening of connection. We may believe that we are introverts but it does not take away the fact that we are humans and we need physical contact. Perhaps it is because we are introverts that we desire a deepening of relationships. We may not need 5,000 friends on Facebook but we sure would love having meaningful friendships. Bear in mind that deep meaningful relationships do not just happen overnight. It involves connection and time.

We reach out also by increasing the number of contact points with the people who can benefit from the solution we help provide. Each of us has a purpose and we can fulfill it in a variety of ways. So it is not just over the web that others can find us. We make ourselves available for meeting one-on-one or in group activities.

Building Connection in an Increasingly Disconnected World

This video says it all on disconnection in today’s world….

Feeling disconnected yourself? Can’t help but feel that there is an electronic device between you and your direct experience with the world? It’s exactly what the main character in the video feels.

All in, if you had been busy for various reasons and have had little time for physical contact with your family and friends, perhaps it is time to make a change.

“Connection is the energy that is created between people when they feel seen, heard and valued – when they can give and receive without judgement.” Brene Brown

To disconnect in order to connect and reconnect, here is my suggestion for the week:

1. Go offline. Stop playing online or computer games. Avoid checking the google analytics on your website. Read your email messages only once a day.

2. Bring greater presence in the physical world. Set aside some time to reconnect with your loved ones and friends. When you are with your friends, give them your 100% attention. Avoid looking at your handphone or taking calls when you are out with your loved ones.

3. Start to notice the little things in greater detail around you. Connection can also be made with nature. Take a walk in the park. Appreciate the beauty in every moment. Inhale deeply. It is time well spent!

Precisely, it is because of wanting to experience relationship love and joyful connections that form one reason why you have chosen to incarnate at this time in this planet called Earth 🙂

Love and abundance always,

evelyn lim signature