Category Archives for "Self Help"
Tools and techniques for self help
5 Consequences of Having a Love-Hate Relationship with Money
Do you have a love-hate relationship with money?
For a start, the idea of having a relationship with money may seem new to you. It sure sounded foreign to me at first. Until one day, after being exposed to the idea from various channels for years, I finally understood it!
One great way to think of the relationship you have money is to draw analogies from the relationship you have with a lover, spouse or partner. It is also easy to imagine such a relationship if you have watched romantic movies and TV shows.
Some of you may declare that you are “in love” with money. Or some of you may confess you are having such a difficult relationship that you resent the struggles you are in. It’s also possible that you describe your relationship with money as one of love-hate.
30 Signs That You Need a Money Mindset Makeover
What are the signs indicating that you need a money mindset makeover?
I find that most people don’t recognise that they could be having a money mindset issue. They prefer to avoid any discussions about money altogether. What’s more, it’s a hit on the ego to admit to having a limiting mindset. Yet ignorance is not bliss when a money mindset makeover can help you grow your income without more pain and struggle.
Your money mindset simply refers to how you have been thinking about money. It affects you in the way you feel and also drives your actions and behavior concerning your finances. If you want to attract financial abundance, having a healthy money mindset is important.
How do you know what your money mindset is like? One great way is to look at what’s been happening in your financial situation. The thoughts and beliefs you have about money impact the outcome that you manifest.
Do You Have a Money Mindset Issue?
Here are 10 signs that you need to have a money mindset makeover immediately…..
1. Money is hard to come by every month.
2. Multiple areas in your life (eg. love and finances) are in jeopardy of crumbling.
Continue reading
How to Love Life Fully
Do you know how to love life fully?
Well, for a period in time, I was asking myself this very question.
I put myself on a search.
The journey felt incidentally harder perhaps because of the internal struggle that I was going through during that period.
Yet, no matter how and where I search, I could not get complete answers.
Which led me to the realisation that I the answers I sought are not out there.
They pretty much lie from within.
The answers came from a wise part of the self….
How to Love: 7 Quotes by Thich Nhat Hanh
How to love is a small but beautiful book by Zen Buddhist Master, Thich Nhat Hanh. It is the third title in the Mindfulness Essentials Series of how-to books. As always, he writes in simple language to explain profound insights from the practice of Buddhism, mindfulness and meditation.
I like that we are taught not just on the importance of self-love, but also how we can love another more fully. The teachings are poignant and persuasive: “to love without knowing how to love, wounds the ones we love.” We are invited to open our hearts in a meditative way.
How to Love is in 4 essentials: you can only love another when you feel true love for yourself; love is understanding; understanding brings compassion; and deep listening and loving speech are key ways of showing your love.
I had felt drawn to reading How to Love as learning to love is the fundamental of all relationships. Whether it is the relationship we have with ourselves, with our partners, success or even money, it rests on love. If we want to find greater meaning or improve on the quality of our living, learning How to Love is essential.
Here are 7 quotes in How to Love by Thich Nhat Hanh….
“Every one of us is trying to find our true home. Some of us are still searching. Our true home is inside, but it’s also in our loved ones around us. When you’re in a loving relationship, you and the other person can be a true home for each other.”
“Understanding someone’s suffering is the best gift you can give another person. Understanding is love’s other name. If you don’t understand, you can’t love.”
“The essence of loving kindness is being able to offer happiness. You can be the sunshine for another person. You can’t offer happiness until you have it for yourself. So build a home inside by accepting yourself and learning to love and heal yourself.”
“In a deep relationship, there’s no longer a boundary between you and the other person. You are her and she is you. Your suffering is her suffering. Your understanding of your own suffering helps your loved one to suffer less.”
“You are part of the universe; you are made of stars. When you look at your loved one, you see that he is also made of stars and carries eternity inside. Looking in this way, we naturally feel reverence. True love cannot be without trust and respect for oneself and for the other person.”
“To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love. To know how to love someone, we have to understand them. To understand, we need to listen.”
“Love is a living, breathing thing. There is no need to force it to grow in a particular direction. If we start by being easy and gentle with ourselves, we will find it is just there inside of us, solid and healing.”
How to Love: Go on a Journey
How to love has turned out to be quite a journey for me.
I learned it with self-love, from writing a book on Self-Love, creating a self-love healing meditation program, improving my relationship with my husband and children, making the choice to do what I love and loving what I do and also, transforming the relationship I have with money.
My lessons have been in many forms and ways and I am still learning How to Love more every single day. The moment I woke up to true love was the moment I began to know who I am.
This post is sent with love from my heart to yours.
Love always,
Evelyn Lim
P.S. Recommended Resources:
1. How to Love by Thich Nhat Hanh
2. Self-Love Secrets
P.S.S. Share Your Thoughts and Comments on How to Love below.
How to Overcome The Lack Mentality of Not Having
One sure sign of lack mentality is if you are constantly thinking “I am not having this” and “I am not having that.” Thought after thought is about by what is missing in your life. Even if there is a lot of good that is going on, your attention is placed on “not having”.
How to Let Go of the Past and Move On
You may be wondering how you can let go of the past and move on fter realizing that you are stuck in it. Letting go to move forward can seem challenging when you have little idea on how to deal with the multitude of emotions that arise. At the same time, you do not feel equipped to move on.
Letting go of the past is certainly something that has not been taught as a life skill back in school. Yet, it is incredibly important. I wish someone had taught me how when I was young. It would also have been nice to receive some wise advice on how I could have let go of the past and move on.
How to Let Go of Resistance to Change
Learning to let go of resistance to change is incredibly important if we are hoping to grow, evolve or improve ourselves. A resistance to change can happen when we are caught in the habit of doing things in a certain way. We become rigid even when the landscape has changed. We lose flexibility. We ask ourselves: why rock the boat when the old ways have worked?
This message became clear to me early last year. A new train station had opened near my home. It now takes 4 minutes for me to walk out of my front door to the train stop. With the newly opened tracks, I have more options in routes to many destinations.
Anyone would have excited about the improved convenience. Except that it took weeks for me to process my increased options. I continued taking old routes and ways to reach where I wanted to go.
Until one day, while at a bus stop, I found myself thinking about how much time I was wasting waiting for a bus that was taking a long time to show up. This was also when I had an “aha” moment (where dark clouds start to part and light finally came in)!
Tapping Script for Self-Love: Overcome Self-Rejection
“The greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity or power but self-rejection.” Henri Nouwen, Catholic priest, professor, writer and theologian.
Are there parts about yourself that you reject?
When you look at yourself in the mirror, do you find it hard to get past your imperfection or flaw?
Is this imperfection or flaw the reason why it is difficult to love and embrace yourself fully?
You may be hoping to be better, smarter, richer, taller or more successful. Whatever it is, there could be something about yourself that you are not happy with yourself. On the extreme, it can be a case of self-rejection.
Life Lesson: Learn to Rise Each Time We Fall
Falling is not failure. Falling is simply part of the learning journey to scaling new heights.
Many of us are afraid of falling. Falling happens when we move from a higher to a lower level. It is usually accompanied with the feeling of having lost balance or control. Many of us perceive falling as a disease, a sign of vulnerability. Including myself.
Well, I am anticipating that I would be falling a lot in a couple of weeks. You see, I am booked on another year-end skiing trip. If you had been following my blog in previous years, you would know that downhill skiing is not my biggest strength. In fact, I have a lot of fears surrounding it.
How Not to Give Up On Yourself
“The only failure in life is giving up on yourself, your hopes and dreams.” #evelynlimcoach
What happens when you give up on yourself?
It can literally mean death. You are basically saying “no” to life. On the contrary, as long as you are in the game, you are still participating in the here and now. Of course, it does not mean that you have achieved worldly success but neither, have you failed.
If you have intense thoughts of giving up on yourself, know that you are not alone. I have walked the alleys of darkness a few times in my life and it is definitely not a place to dwell in. Over the past few years, as an energy healing practitioner , I have also discovered that there are many who are afflicted with depression at one point in their life.
Do know that depression over prolonged periods of time can lead to thoughts of suicide. Please seek professional help. Do not procrastinate. To get well, you definitely need love and support.
It is best to arrest the situation early when you feel as if you are draining of hope. Lean on the survival instinct that is innate and trust that you have got what it takes to figure a way out. You don’t give up yet! Bear in mind that everyone has a choice. We can choose to see the stars or we can choose the mud. The choice determines which thought we pay attention to.