Category Archives for "Relationships"
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How to Transform Your Relationship with Money
How to transform your relationship with money?
Perhaps you are used to the idea of consulting a financial advisor or a banker on money matters….but it may feel weird to envisage having a relationship with money, much less transform it.
I get it. The idea of having a relationship with money may not be something that you often come across. As someone who used to work in a bank, I certainly did not see this in any of its training manuals. It’s also not a topic that was taught in school. Still, these reasons aside, it’s never too late to begin having a whole new perspective towards money.
Let’s backtrack a little.
Why even bother with the idea of improving your relationship with money?Can we have a relationship with something that is inanimate?
Why even think about money as forming a relationship with it?
Why is it important and how do you transform your relationship with money (when you prefer to avoid handling financial matters)?
These questions had bothered me some years ago, and after realising that I could not get any meaningful idea from others online, I decided that I needed to search for my own answers. These answers have inadvertently helped me to grow on a personal basis and to also help others find out more about their own relationship with money since then.
If you have been wondering the same or are curious to find out more, may I have the permission to shed more light?
For a start, let’s bring attention to the word “relationship”.
Enneagram Type 9: Positive Affirmations for Path of Growth
Overview of the Enneagram Type 9: The Peacemaker, Mediator, Spiritual Seeker
If you are an Enneagram Type 9, you are about harmony. You are peace-loving, trusting, easy-going and even-tempered. Your mantra is to go with the flow. Sitting on the crown of the Enneagram, you hold spiritual instincts. What is ironical is that despite your orientation to spirituality, you are potentially the most grounded in the physical world.
You exude a positive energy. What appeals is the pleasant side of life. You enjoy being stress-free and desire life to be effortless. Being optimistic, you carry the faith that things will somehow work out on its own. Your belief is that everything will be okay should everyone stay cool and collected and no one rocks the boat.
“If you have fear of some pain or suffering, you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it. If you can, there is no need to worry about it; if you cannot do anything, then there is also no need to worry.” — 14th Dalai Lama
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Enneagram Type 5: Positive Affirmations for Path of Growth
Overview of the Enneagram Type 5: The Observer, Investigator, Thinker, Sage
If you are an Enneagram Type 5, you are intellectual, informed and logical. You are an observer of life, and prefer to stay on the sidelines. You like others to see you as someone wise, perceptive and knowledgeable.
You prefer to conserve your energy instead of participating or engaging actively in life. Staying on the sidelines is your way of maintaining calm and composure in a seemingly chaotic world. To make sense of the chaos, you seek refuge in knowledge. Subject mastery appeals to you. As an Enneagram Type 5, you are part of the thinking triad (Types 5, 6 and 7).
“I am turned into a sort of machine for observing facts and grinding out conclusions.” Charles Darwin
Enneagram Type 4: Positive Affirmations for Path of Growth
Overview of Enneagram Type 4: Individualist, Romantic, Artist
As an Enneagram Type 4, you are authentic, creative, expressive and self-aware. You have the need to express yourself uniquely. Typically, you enjoy expressing your feelings through some creative works such as music, painting, and acting. What you desire are experiences that are rich and meaningful.
“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.” e. e. cummings
Enneagram Type 3: Positive Affirmations for Path of Growth
Overview of Enneagram Type 3: The Performer, Achiever, Motivator
If you are an Enneagram Type 3, you enjoy projecting the image of success. You place focus on goals, efficiency and checking off your to-do lists. Ambitious, you are driven by your desire for personal accomplishments. As a high functioning Type 3, you are confident, with the ability to harness your strengths and to motivate others to greater heights.
“The path to success is to take massive, determined action.” – Tony Robbins
“Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough. We must do.” Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
Enneagram Type 1: Positive Affirmations for Path of Growth
“Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.” – Salvador Dali
I am on a Round-The-Enneagram tour, covering all 9 Enneagram Types in turn. Over the course of 9 weeks, I will be laying out positive affirmations aimed at serving the path of growth for each Enneagram Type. Please start off with a basic introduction to The Enneagram, as a guide for transformation, before reading on.
Overview of Enneagram Type 1: The Reformer, Perfectionist, Achiever
If you are a Type 1, you strongly emphasise key moral values such as responsibility, integrity, order, discipline and control. You place attention on what is right and what is wrong and will fight for justice. You have idealistic dreams, with the goal of improving the world.
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Disconnect to Connect and Reconnect
“Disconnect to rediscover the joys in connection.”
Are you spending copious amount of time on Facebook?
Can’t live without a wifi connection?
Can’t imagine days without your handphone or mobile?
It’s a common sight to see people on their handheld devices. In restaurants, family members are in their own separate mobile world even whilst they are seated together. Children are given ipads for their own separate entertainment in dinner sittings. While crossing the traffic junction, people can be texting away on their phones. On buses, I see passengers watching video clips on their mobiles or checking their FB accounts. In fact, sometimes, I find myself straining to see what they are looking at on their handheld devices.
When Mr Right Is Turning Out Wrong
“We waste time looking for the perfect love, instead of creating the perfect love.” Timothy Oliveria
In our dreams, we would like Mr Right to rescue us, read our minds and surprise us with thoughtful gifts every year that we are married.
We are prompted to look for Mr Right. Female magazines share countless advice on how to nab the perfect man. And so, we end up with some vague notion of the perfect life that we are going to lead after marriage. However, we have a rude awakening when reality does not match this ideal dream. Rita Rutner, comedian and actress, said this candidly…
“When I eventually met Mr Right, I had no idea that his first name was Always.”
50 Shades of Fear
I thought it would be interesting to share my perspective on 50 shades of fear. Clients had been coming to me with their issues which are rooted in various forms of fear. In case you are wondering, I did not read the book 50 Shades of Grey nor have watched the movie. However, I would like to borrow the theme of 50 shades.
As we already know, fear can manifest at different levels and degrees of negative emotions; which is influenced by the story that our minds tell. Our fears make up the stories we tell ourselves.
For instance, fear can be in the form of worry….or in more severe cases, it can grow into depression. Fear can also be in the form of nervousness or a diagnosed panic disorder. We can also express fear in the form of blame or if we feel it strongly, we become antagonistic. Obvious symptoms can range from breaking out in cold sweat, turning ashen white, or the racing of our hearts. Whether a niggling sense of anxiety or intense anger, all are signs of fear.
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7 Ways to Resolve Money Conflicts For Saving Your Marriage
“Treasure your relationships, not your possessions.” Anthony J D Angelo
You may perceive two hundred dollars as small change, but your partner kicks up a big fuss.
You may deem the purchase of an item as a necessary expense, but your partner thinks otherwise.
You may place a cap for spending on a vacation at one thousand dollars, but your partner has a different quantum in mind.
Then, there is the question of fairness. Who is entitled to spend the excess money in the joint account first?
With the end of the honeymoon phase in your marriage, you could find that money is the constant thing that you had been bickering about with your spouse.
Well, you are not alone.
It is common for couples to fight over money matters. As I wrote last week, money has been cited as a major factor leading to a marriage breakdown.
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