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3 Examples of Secondary Gain That Keep You Financially Stuck

What is secondary gain?

 

Secondary gain keeps you in sabotage. You may have a certain goal, desire or dream. However, the existence of a secondary gain obstructs you from taking the necessary steps for goal alignment. The secondary gain is the reason that keeps you stuck. You mistakenly perceive that there is a greater benefit to remaining where you currently are.

 

secondary gain to fear

Let’s apply that to a money situation. You have the dream of becoming a successful entrepreneur. Yet, you take no action towards the dream. You choose to spend hours playing Candy Crush on Facebook or some other computer game with whatever free time you have. The secondary gain that you derive is the feel-good that you derive from the games.

 

It becomes difficult for a breakthrough once you are stuck in mindless repetitive activity. You could be in the same state for a very long time. You are aware of how frustrated you feel about not achieving your dream, but could be unconscious to the specific secondary benefit that is preventing you from moving forward.

Hence, if you find yourself giving plenty of excuses for not taking a positive step or action in the direction of your dream, ask yourself what is the real reason why you are keeping yourself stuck.

 

Could you be facing some fear?

 

Is there a secondary gain?

 

What keeps you in the comfort zone and prevents from taking a risk?

 

3 scenarios of secondary gain that applies in a money situation:

 

1. Secondary Gain That Relates to Fear About Not Enough Time.

 

Scenario: Going for your dreams possibly entail aligning to your potential. Yet, you have the fear that if you align to your fullest potential, you will have to spend more hours at work. This means that you end up with less time for yourself and family. The secondary gain that you derive from not stepping up to full power is the sabotaging belief that you get to have more time.

 

Alternative Perspective: Well, I would like to propose an alternative perspective. It is not necessarily true that aligning with fullest potential necessarily means having to spend more hours at work. If you are operating at maximum potential, you can ultimately work less for the same number of hours. You earn more for the same hour of work that you put in.

In fact, you are likely to experience greater freedom when you are at your best. You impact more lives and you attract prosperity with greater ease. You become happier overall. Your family benefits when you are in a positive state.

 

2. Secondary Gain That Relates to Fear About People Borrowing Money.

 

Scenario: You have the fear that your friends and relatives will borrow money from you if you become rich. You simply resent the idea of being treated like a cash machine or bank for others. Also, you dislike the idea of attracting friends who only like you because you are wealthy.

 

Hence, the secondary gain for you is to avoid having too much money. You figure that having little absolves you from the experience of guilt. You can legitimately say “no” to the request of money from your friends and relatives. And so, you prefer to remain where you are.

 

Alternative perspective: You are limiting your capacity to make more money, based on the actions of others. I have noticed this in a couple of clients. If it is the same for you, your subconscious automatically sets a limit to what this dollar amount is.

 

There is some kind of glass ceiling. Hence, no matter how hard you work, you will find it hard to make or earn more. What could be frustrating for you is that your friends and relatives continue to come your way, despite your small bank balance.

 

Well, there are many ways to help your friends and relatives even if they come to you directly for cash. You can help them with getting jobs for instance. Or you can help them with getting educated about money management. In fact, you will feel more empowered to assist others when you are in a position of strength.

 

3. Secondary Gain That Relates to the Fear of Responsibility.

 

Scenario: You have the fear of having to shoulder more responsibilities if you step up. Although stepping up means being able to make more money, you are reluctant to do so because you equate responsibilities with having more problems. Your subconscious mind reasons that it is best to play small. Hence, even though there are opportunities to step up, you decide to decline.

 

Alternative perspective: Have you considered the perspective that the Universe will not send you any opportunity that you cannot handle? More responsibilities may not necessarily result in more problems although stepping up is likely to mean you will be handling tasks with a bigger scope. You are now challenged to grow by stretching your creativity, imagination, and problem-solving abilities.

 

Shatter Your Secondary Gain

 

The reason to your secondary gain is understandable but not necessary.

 

You are essentially short changing yourself when you impose internal limits.

 

By bringing awareness, you can release the sabotage brought about by your secondary gain.

 

Hence, to shift from a stuck position, consider illuminating perspectives that help you shatter your glass ceiling. Release the emotional money story that your mind has made around your secondary gain.

 

Make the shift forward!

 

Love and abundance always,

evelyn lim signature

Abundance Alchemy Coach

For coaching/energy healing sessions to help you make that shift, contact me.

Share Your Thoughts

Do share with me any thoughts or comments that you have about secondary gain or limiting financial blocks below.

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Evelyn

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Ryan Biddulph - November 18, 2013 Reply

I think we each have blind spots Evelyn. The wealthiest people on earth simply hire people to point out their blind spots do them or push out of their comfort zones to reveal these low energy blocks.

Thanks!

Ryan

[Reply]

Evelyn Reply:

Hello Ryan,

It is true that many of us have blind spots. Yes, if we are hoping to make a breakthrough, hiring a mentor or coach can be particularly helpful. I certainly have learned from various masters and teachers over the years. I have been pushed out of my discomfort zone to make a stand in my true worth.

All the best to you!

Love and abundance always,
Evelyn

[Reply]

Eze Bright Chidera - November 18, 2013 Reply

Pathway to success:
Success is an intelligeble, deliberate, and strategic action. Setting of a goal without proper plan is like a dream or desire which may not come to pass. For some to be successful he/she must work adquatly to archeive it. In fact , to be succefull financially, accademically, and otherwise you must be hardworking.reluctancy does not bring fourt success.
By kings Bright…..

[Reply]

Evelyn Reply:

Hello Eze,

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the pathway to success. I agree that massive action is very necessary for success to happen! Just do it!

Love and abundance always,
Evelyn

[Reply]

Cathy Taughinbaugh - November 20, 2013 Reply

Hi Evelyn,

Great points here about a secondary gain that keeps you stuck. It is easy to get sidetracked and not fully understand what is holding you back. Setting goals, having a short TO DO of things that must get done helps me stay focused. Good reminder!

[Reply]

Galen Pearl - November 20, 2013 Reply

When I read this it seemed so obvious, but I never thought about this! Now I can be more aware of how I can block my progress on one objective by being sidetracked by another. I probably do this every day. Thanks for the lesson in paying attention and redirecting.

[Reply]

Tiphanie - November 21, 2013 Reply

Love this… secondary benefits. Its interesting, when we share with people, you are getting something out of being stuck, they look at us, like we are nuts. LOL

I often refer to them as ANGLES (those points of view(s) that each of us are programmed, conditioned, or taught and later buy as our own. Those unexamined behaviors that we visually refer to as “habits” or “family traditions- Including, but not limited to, the secret, invisible, covert, unseen, hidden, unheard, unacknowledged thoughts, behaviors, beliefs and decisions that are made each and every moment.

Angles are kinks, chains, blocks in the flow of energy. They restrict or prevent you from harnessing the power of your truth and receiving the things you desire. They are energetic plugs locked into place by our judgments, conclusions, beliefs, opinions and the like….
We value those ANGLES… and since we know that negativity is addicting, there is that hurdle to overcome as well.

In this clearing process I developed… part of it, is the VALUE prong—what is the VALUE of my ANGLE… There is always some sort of value in NOT getting the things we desire… wild as that is.

One question I pose… what expansive money opportunities am I refusing, but this ________ I keep choosing… and allow that energy to come up… and clear it.

Great post… sharing it straight away! 🙂

[Reply]

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